Wednesday, February 28, 2007

I am sitting outside the Subway restaurant

I am sitting outside the Subway restaurant on University Avenue in Palo Alto. Subway's great virtue is its economy: for a mere $3 you get a meal filling and wholesome.

Current disposition is relaxed, somewhat fatigued from a couple of late nights. I will be checking into work periodically today to see if new tasks appear in my queue; otherwise I will endeavour to relax this Sunday. A whole day unscheduled! I am unaccustomed to this luxury. How is such a day lived well?

Perhaps it will be a day of readings of scripture, meditations on life past and present, and future. Maybe some great idea will seize me - those are rare. Or perhaps it is enough to be grateful for the current minute, in which I am - thank God - healthy and in need of nothing.

But what will the future bring?

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

It is night in Palo Alto.

It is night in Palo Alto. I'm looking outside the open window of a room on the 3rd floor of the Cardinal Hotel. At the bus shelter outside, a man in city-worker garb draws shovel and broom together to loosen the material that has collected around the base of the garbage can. The light on his headband glows blue; the taillights on his white Chevrolet flash yellow. Two cyclists amble past, with flashing red lights. Vocalizations emanate from the truck radio.

Across from my room is an art-supplies store. The third floor has a sign: "Space Available, 650-857-0116, Alhouse - Deaton". The third floor has 12 windows; two of them are lit.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

I am sitting on a step at the back of an abandoned building in Palo Alto.

I am sitting on a step at the back of an abandoned building in Palo Alto. The sun shines, the sky is blue, but all I can think of is this malaise which has afflicted me for the past week. Body ache, throat ache, headache - it reduces the pleasure of living. Writing about it seems to help.

Today, for me, is a rare pause in the busy-ness of living. The cool air sweeps over my painful temples. Today reminds me of university days - sunny weather, freedom from serious responsibility. Those days are long past.

For the first time in several days, I listen to my environment. The crinkle of an aircraft engine fades to silence. Amazonian bird noises twitter in the foliage. A painful cough escapes me; pressure builds in my brow. I hear scraping door and tableware noises in the neighbouring lot. And the rise and fall of a police siren, and the pneumatic rise of the ventilation system of the Wells Fargo building.

25 minutes before the Latin mass at St. Thomas Aquinas church in Palo Alto.

An obese squirrel clambers up a fence and peeks over it. The strange pressure builds in my sinuses again. The sunlight dims, then surges. Another airplane crosses the sky, on the same path as the first. The blustery Wells Fargo ventilator flusters the foliage. Three brown beer bottles and two green ones sit on a window sill - this does remind me of university days. Those days are long past.

17 minutes before the Latin mass at St. Thomas Aquinas church in Palo Alto.

I move from the shade into the sunlight. I sit cross-legged on the parking-lot pavement. Sitting in the sunlight with a cool breeze - how pleasant! Tapping the pavement with my PDA stylus makes pleasant metallic noises.

7 minutes before the Latin mass at St. Thomas Aquinas church in Palo Alto.

Commovisti Domine terram, et conturbasti eam - Thou hast moved the earth, O Lord, and hast troubled it.

The four steps of lectio divina

Useful summary of the four steps of lectio divina (prayerful reading of scripture):

"Seek in reading and you will find in meditating; knock in mental prayer and it will be opened to you by contemplation."

- Guigo the Carthusian, Scala Paradisi: PL 40, 998, quoted in the Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2654